F is for 'Falling for you' (Mr pt 2)

***I'm gonna go ahead and post two in one day today since I don't think I'm going to have the energy tomorrow. There is stuff!! This is also a Sunday when no posting is supposed to be happening but I will stop till Tuesday and then all will be right with the world ***

I decided for this post to be super honest and  take it personal... waaaay personal. Why not right?? Today a letter to Mr... (who we first met here)

Dear Mr

You're kind of amazing. You are also kind of annoying and I sometimes want to punch you in the face but ever since we've had the chance to hang out properly I have found myself, much to my dismay, really and seriously falling for you. 

I haven't told you this and right now I'm really focusing on not letting it fall out of my mouth. I really have no idea how to say it or really exactly what I even want to say so let the random stream of consciousness begin ! 

When we're together it's the most natural thing in the world. I am so damn comfortable with you and I love the way you look after me. As I always tell you, you're so smart and you have such cool stories, I am endlessly entertained and fascinated by you. You are so good at doing little things that I always notice and which always make me smile. I don't know if you know you're even doing them or the value I really place on them though. I guess I should probably tell you things like that shouldn't I?  :)

I like that we're so different and yet we get on so well. It's cool for our worlds to collide and I hope they begin to collide more and more.  I am falling hard for you but we're not there yet. I want the chance to be able to make you as happy as you make me and I don't know how to do it yet. There's a lot more to learn. 

I'm falling for you fast. Someone like you is a totally new experience for me and I like it. I don't want to tell you this yet because it feels like we have a lot of adapting to each other and each others lives to do before my cynical and overly analytic brain can accept it as real. I am beginning to learn that sometimes it's good to lead with your heart instead of your head but it's not easy to change the habits of a life time.

I promise to be as patient as I can with you if you do the same for me. I want to be careful not to change you and I don't plan to change who I am either but when we get to the point that we can evolve in little ways together and find real, mutually satisfying compromises then that will be the time that I can and will confidently tell you that I love you. Until then it will be a secret that I just share with the internet ok? :-P

xo