The new normal...

It's been almost exactly a year to the day since I last posted but it feels like time for a catch up. Over the last few months I've had so much happen that I've really felt like some sort of creative type of outlet would be awesome. At the end of January I became a member of that club that unfortunately so many of us are a member of either directly or by default. I was diagnosed with uterine cancer (which I like to think of as the other C-Bomb...) 

Since then I've been spending a ton of time at the hospital and just recovering from 3 surgeries. I'll begin my Radiotherapy and Chemotherapy treatment next week. I've just found that this one diagnosis has changed so many things. SO.MANY.THINGS! I am really living with a new normal that I didn't choose but which I am having to adjust to quickly. 

I'm learning so much and receiving so much energy and love from people that I am completely humbled. I feel uncomfortable to be receiving that which is my 'normal' to provide but I'm really trying to just relax and be grateful that I'm going through this surrounded by all the people that I'm surrounded by and whilst being a citizen of a fantastic country that provides spectacular care. 

I had a hysterectomy to deal with the uterine cancer and that means that at the ripe old age of 37 I am officially in menopause! FUN TIMES.  Pre treatment and post surgery the hot flushes are the biggest thing that I'm dealing with. I'm super lucky that for me they're ok and I can pretty much deal. It does provide a certain amount of humour when shy and prudish me ends up unashamedly cooking dinner in my underwear because it's just toooo hot.

So yeah... I have a lot to say and I'm forever experiencing new things so I am going to probably have a ton to say on the subject. I'm also, of course, still living my life and doing all those things that I love to do so as I hope to be reestablishing the blog I will also write about cool stuff that happens. I do tend to find that if you look for it you can find a LOT of cool stuff :)

xo

I've found the secret!!!

A long time ago my friend gave me a great bit of advice. I was rabbiting on about not having the will power or determination to get myself on the health train and she said... (dum da dum dum) "Don't take things away just add them" 

It's actually such a simple and elegant solution to the "I cant give up sugar" or "I don't have time to exercise" or any other excuse. In essence don't give up sugar. Don't even think about the sugar you eat and drink just add as much water and clean food that you can. Drink that coke and eat that chocolate but add in a few glasses of water and some almonds for example. The idea being that if you slowly keep adding "good" things you eventually wont have space or time for the "bad" things that you're trying to give up or change about yourself.

I took her advice on board at the time. I thought it made sense and was pretty smart actually but didn't really do anything about it until recently.  Since I've moved into my own house I've been trying to add things to my routines. I'm very driven by routines , I love them. In the last month I've added a glass of water, A face washing-hair brushing-tooth cleaning routine to my mornings and I've added a ton of walking to my day.  So far I'm noticing that waking up is so much easier and I'm so much more on to it when I get to work.

I've added in my asthma preventor medication twice a day and OH MY GOD I ran for the train this afternoon and humid as it was I was barely out of breath and nothing like the red faced, heaving chested wheezy mess I usually am!!!!

I'm loving this simple idea and it's already working for me. In the next few weeks I want to add as much water as I can and I want to add more sleep. About 8 hours a night sounds good to me. After that I will add some sort of exercise class I'd say. I've only been thinking about doing it for about 3 weeks but the results are great so who knows what the future might hold and I can still enjoy drinking coke and eating Easter chocolate!! PERFECT

xo

A moment of perfection

I've been running all over town recently doing a bunch of fun things. There has been the Auckland arts festival going on and it's been such nice weather why not make the most of it? I moved into my new flat (which I LOVE), my nephew said my name properly for the first time which was really cool , it was Tony's birthday and the list just goes on and on . 

It's been a busy and exciting and really really fun time. In the middle of it all there was one special moment. It was one moment that took my breath away. In that moment everything was so perfect that I didn't quite know how to process all the amazing-ness :)

Tony had gotten us tickets to see Fela! the concert at the Civic. We had just taken our seats which were amazing and I was sitting there in that special, beautiful building with my wonderful man beside me. We were watching the band warm up and I was staring at the ceiling waiting for the shooting star to shoot across the 'sky'.... I've never felt luckier or happier. There was literally no where else I would have wanted to be.

I've been trying to recognise those moments and document them. I don't think that I'll ever forget sitting there and having to catch my breath but if I take the time to document it then when I'm having a really crappy day I can read back through my archives and remember that actually perfect things do exist and they do happen to me. 

xo

Musings from the shower...

I'm off to spend the weekend with the BF tomorrow YAY :) 

I was just in the shower doing all of the things so that I look as good as possible for him and thinking about how I want to cook him my favorite tomato pasta for dinner and I got so embarrassed! I started thinking how silly I was being and how it's insane that I'm getting excited to cook for him because I'm a terrible cook!  He cooks and I do a mean set of dishes hahahaha

AND THEN I gave myself a mental slap and realised that this doesn't mean I'm turning into a 1950's housewife or that I'm not a modern woman at all or even that I'm acting like a 15 year old. It means that we have a good relationship I'd say. These days it's so frowned upon for someone to say that they're actually in love with their partner. To say that they want to look good for them and do things for no other reason than to make them happy. In our particular relationship these things have tended to fall within traditional gender roles which just adds an extra layer of weird.

I wish that it were socially acceptable to say these things out loud! I'm just so sick of all this weird feeling that it's only ok to speak about a man if it's negative or sexual. I'm done with it and just so I'm not a hypocrite here goes....

I'm a modern , educated woman who makes sure that she shaves her legs and cuts her toe nails before spending the night. I make a point of trying to enjoy some of what he enjoys and I always tell him how handsome he is. I love him and it's not cute or sweet it's just how it is. Giving those things to him does not diminish me in anyway because he lights up my life in completely random ways all the time. We work because we're always trying to impress each other and it's awesome!

... SO THERE! 

Hahahahahahah Rant officially done

xoxo

The Jar of good memories

My friend Anoushka made this jar for me for Christmas... well, she decorated and purposed it for me I'm pretty sure her glass blowing skills aren't that great! 

The idea is that I write down all the moments that either make me smile or are ones I want to remember and store them in the jar over the year. At the end of the year it will be really nice to read them and reminisce about all the great things that happened during the year.

This photo was taken on January 20... it's safe to say my life is pretty good at the moment. I think they range from "Mum cooked an awesome meal" to "Tony came to have lunch with me and it was so sweet it nearly made me cry"!! hahahaha!  So, it's  smaller things AND larger things but all things that make me grateful and appreciative of all of the people I have.

I cant wait to read through them all at the end of the year but I think more to the point I cant wait for all of the moments that I know are going to be filling that jar to overflowing between now and then :)

xoxo

I cant decide if my life is embarrassingly sad or insanely awesome!

I didn't ever plan to make this blog quite as personal as I have recently but to be honest these are the types of blogs I like to read and also right now the things that are on my mind are kind of personal... so WHATEVER.

Tonight I went to the Library to get my new book ( Landline by Rainbow Rowell *SQUEE*) and then decided since I wasn't quite ready to go home that I would have something to eat before going for a bus. I probably chose a really dumb place to eat because it's dark and lovely and not a place to be on a Friday night by yourself. Within two sips of my overly sweet muscato I was starting to get really pissy with my life. I mean it's pretty cool to be able to read in lovely surrounds while eating beautiful crepes BUT on a Friday night after a week of work I'd really like to not be taking myself out on a romantic date. I'd really like to have someone to unwind with and to enjoy it with me! I thought that a boyfriend would be good for that sort of thing but of course I end up with one who lives in a different world that runs on different norms. It just all feels really unfair sometimes. 

Now I'm being a brat I know and obviously I am in no way comparing my situation to people with actual problems but it's so frustrating and a little depressing. 

I tend to go on a bit of a roller-coaster with my thoughts on being in a relationship with someone who has a ridiculous job they adore. On one hand, I have a great man who's amazing to be around and is nothing but awesome to me and who has a work ethic that I am actually really proud of BUT on the other I essentially have the life of a single person without actually having the right to act like one.  It's not that I have any desire to act like a single person and get on that dating wheel again, not even a little bit, but I get all the bad things about being single without the fun of dating! NO FAIR

HUMPH! I know logically that it's about accepting all parts of the person and loving them for who they are and what they bring to your life. I know that the universe is 'not a wish granting factory' and as such it's important to be able to be flexible with what you're wanting and dreaming of. To be able to reconcile what you want with what you get. I know that if I'm going to get off this roller-coaster I need to accept what I have in this adorable man and adjust my expectations. After all, who knows what the future holds. I am probably missing parts of the puzzle and maybe in time a picture will reveal itself that surpasses all of my dreams and is more than what I could hope for right now.  

ARGH

Ok whiny baby time is over!

Going home to read more of this cool book and clean my house so I can go to the film festival guilt free tomorrow ;-)

This is not what I sat down here to write!

At the start of the week I heard about a cool thing that was happening tonight and I asked my boyfriend if he was free to come with me. when he said he was working I kind of lost it a little bit. Several minutes of swearing and being REALLY mad ensued. It's not his fault he happened to be working on the one random night I wanted to do something but I felt so disappointed and all sorts of " what's the point of having a bf if he's never around??". It was unfair and just a tad crazy.

SO...I decided that I'm an independent grown woman and there is nothing stopping me doing cool things alone. For some reason it didn't occur to me to ask if one of my friends wanted to come. I guess I was just wanting to spend this time with him. I called it my Beyonce moment!! hahaha.  As it turns out I got half way to said cool thing and decided I couldn't be bothered so got a Japanese curry and am just waiting for my bus as I type. 

Before the bf and I became serious I used to do everything by myself. I had zero qualms about doing any and everything that I wanted to do on my own terms and that's how I went into the relationship. It's kind of hilarious how much 6 months can change a person. I didn't want him to take up too much of my time or to be too intense about things. I kind of wanted a friend with benefits which is so hard to believe now. I've done an almost, but not quite 360 on the issue. Now I think of him before I make any plan and I want him around as much as I can get him... which sadly isn't very much. It's so hard to accept but I'm getting there. I don't know what the future holds but I do know that for now and in this moment I am actually in love. SO WEIRD.

 

I completely embarrassed myself tonight by going against all of my principles and long held ideas and going into a jewelry shop to try on a diamond... by myself. 

I guess I am a total girl at the end of the day. 

xo

an awesome long weekend

Ahhh got to love a long weekend! ... of course being pretty much unemployed means that the public holidays mean next to nothing to me. I spent the weekend with Mr and it was really good even though we didn't do heaps. I have been loving listening to his old school LPs and hearing a bunch of different music played on that format. Could possibly be a real music snob hiding under my layers of love for Beyonce :P

We listened to the Sound City album and then watched the movie. What a cool experience. I'm not into rock particularly but the documentary was really interesting and I actually did enjoy the music. After that we danced around the lounge to Dr Hook... LOL

We went to a birthday party at Little Easy on Ponsonby Road. There was a tab which was a nice surprise and on the whole I loved this place. Great music, fab staff and a really cool vibe designed by Lovelace & co (I think). 

Mr lives close to a really good Op shop. He found a few amazing buys. A great jumper that looks amazing on him for $5! I didn't find anything except this creepy Ronald McDonald doll in the toy bin .... which I didn't buy LOLOL

I've been reading this book over the weekend because Ariel Bissett who is one of my fave book-tubers recommended it so highly. I'm not quite done but at this point I must admit..."my name is Anita and I am loving a book about mermaids" HAHAHA

So there ya go. A weekend of hanging with my fave man and broadening my musical horizons. Drinking on a tab in a great bar, watching documentaries and just generally having a great, low key time. I wish I could do that every weekend!

xo

The most relaxing day EVER

This weekend I'm planning to be super productive and get myself back on track towards no longer failing at life. I have plans y'all :) On my to do list for the weekend is to read two books. I haven't really been reading much over the last few months and I miss it. I need that in my life. This is my selection for the weekend and it was so hard to decide which to jump into first but in the end I read 'Love letters to the dead' in one sitting pretty much today. OhMyGawd I have to agree with every You-Tuber who I've seen praising this book. It's so sad and so intense but the writing is AMAZING. It's really beautiful. Actually this reminds me a lot of Eleanor and Park.

Today I woke up at 6am (thanks brain but its Saturday!!!) so I tried really hard to go back to sleep but when that was a fail I just lay there day dreaming and watching you-tube clips on my phone. Finally I got out of bed around 11.

Then I ran up to the shops for some supplies and a coffee and when I got back it was time to turn on spotify and fall into a different world. As I mentioned I chose well :)

I took two breaks to do a workout inspired by blogilates from YouTube. I only did about 15 minutes and 8-10 minutes but let me tell you....Im'a feel that ish tomorrow! WOWZERS. It's all part of my getting my shizz together plan and I feel like I can fit that into everyday at least once. Tomorrow if it's not raining I plan to go for a walk instead. No point living at the beach and not making the most of it.

I didn't talk to anybody except the lovely girl who makes my coffee all day and while that would usually make me feel bored and lonely for some reason today all I feel is incredibly relaxed. It's been awesome and I reckon one more day will be brilliant. I think I'm going to jump into 'crash into you' tomorrow and I also have Pretty Little Liars and Hart of Dixie to watch. I cant wait :)

Hope your weekend is as awesome as mine.

xo

And he hits it out of the park AGAIN :)

I had such an awesome Sunday this weekend. It made me feel so grateful to live in this lovely city and so lucky to have such a cool guy to share such fun times with and make me feel so special.

We began with a quick stop at a flash hotel to have a look at the view from the top. It was pure glamour and I tell you, I want to move in there :) Super beautiful. 

Ahhhhh I love it. The building has a long history in Auckland and I have vague memories of coming to this room for morning tea with my dad when I was little and it was still used as a canteen type of place. It's much prettier now.

I stopped into St Patricks to listen to the choir prepare for the service. I was a little disappointed (just a little though) to miss the service because from what I could tell the male choir leader was singing and his voice is just so amazing!  I lit a candle for my flat mate and all my hopes and dreams before I left.

After the hotel we went down to the seafood market at Wynyard quarter and absolutely destroyed our seafood platter for two and also a bit more beer than was probably good for us. It was fantastic and eating like that really lead to a great vibe. We were sharing and just going slow and enjoying the beautiful food. I love that restaurant and after chatting with the manager it sounds like there are some exciting things on the horizon for it that will mean it's going to be a top choice all year round and not just in summer like it is now. If you're ever in Auckland and looking for a great place to eat ... look no further.

HEHEHE this is how good the sauce on the muscles was. mmmmmmm He actually just beat  me to it. I would totally have had a go at the bucket if I thought of it first, I mean there weren't that many people around... 

Stolen from Mr's facebook.. I stopped taking photos by the time we got here :)

After spending hours and hours eating and drinking and sneaking in to watch the Warriors play on the big screen in the wine theater we strolled up to Ichiban Japanese restaurant on Albert street. It's a teeny little place with a whole wall of fun manga to look at while you eat. I have never quite got my head around graphics ( I know I suck) but these were really cool to flip through because they were all in Japanese. It just enforced my feeling that the best thing to decorate with is books!! I have no idea how we had room for any more food but I have to say that my curry went down very well indeed :)  I still prefer Ramen-Daikoku in Britomart for cheap Japanese but this was fun and absolutely value for money.

So. Awesome city + Awesome boy = Extremely happy me :)

xo

The GOOD with the BAD

***Long random sorta post ahead***

Things in my neck of the world have been a bit of a whirlwind over the last 6 weeks or so. It's so hard not to be all 'poor me' but there have been so many fantastic things that I have loved during this time that if I do dip my toe into the quick sand just thinking about them is enough to pull me out.

At the end of march my flatmate passed away. She didn't just pass away she had an accident here at home and I had to call the ambulance and it was a pretty nasty situation. I didn't think she would pass away that night but it was still so scary. Even now, all these weeks later it's still a little hard to actually fathom that she died. After a life of having these types of accidents and not dying ... she died. Hmmm. It's impossible to get my head around and it's so easy to say all the right things and of course the brain knows, logically that things couldn't have been different but generally speaking when things happen the heart is more powerful than the head. 

During the month I've had disappointment after disappointment on the job front and the resurgence of an injury that I just didn't think was ever going to be a problem again but which has meant that I've had to turn down work which always sucks. My finances are so stressful and past choices are making it hard right now. Of course it will all be better when I have an income!

So there's all of that and while I'm adjusting to looking for a new job and a new place to live I have had some major first world problems that have simply added together to make life so frustrating and kinda sorta like I'm constantly walking through gel ... or something. 

Today is the last day in my 100 happy days project. Looking back through the last month or so of pictures has really made me realise how incredibly lucky I am. If I were religiously inclined, which I'm not, I would say I were blessed. 

My friends and family have, on several situations helped me to have some amazing and fun times. Two nights after my flatmate went to hospital Mr left me speechless and just a wee bit in awe of him when he gave me a private tour of the civic and then a little later a crazy fun night in that had me wearing his clothes plus fairy wings and a crown and dancing around the house with his flatmate :)

I got to go to a hot air balloon show ( ?) which was really amazing. I've actually spent a ton of time with my sister and nephew in the last little while and I've really enjoyed it though having a 16 month old staying with me in my totally not child friendly house was freaking exhausting!. 

I finally had the graduation ceremony for my Graduate Diploma in Teaching. It was such a surprise to me but the day was super special and really enjoyable. I loved participating and I'm so glad that I went along. This ceremony was so much better than my graduation from my degree :)

My mom has been really supportive in lots of ways but she worked really hard to make it possible for me to have a dinner party for 8 of my friends. This is actually a bigger deal than it sounds and I had a fantastic time. The party was to celebrate my birthday and my graduation and my friend getting a job and also the fact that I thought I was going to be leaving this hood. 

Today I went for a long walk and I realised anew that this neighbour hood is spectacular and I am very lucky to live here. It's so great to live at the beach. Every day it's a little different and while it looks awesome it often also smells pretty great which is something that I love. 

So yeah. Things might be a little hard right now and while I'm prone to over thinking and being a drama queen I have an amazing life that is only going to get better. I am going to keep on keeping on and keep making plans and dreaming dreams because THATS how things get better. I will keep trying to reach my ideals and then when I do I will find new ones. I just need to take a breath and chill out sometimes.

We're FaceBook Official...

terrible photo that I love #1 

It was my birthday yesterday and this guy busts out with "we should change our status on face book" .... LOL it was so funny. He was really cute about it and now we're "Facebook official". It's the funniest thing to be honest. I hadn't really thought about the idea of making any sort of announcement. I was just happy to do our thing. "Hi face book friends...I really like this guy and we hang out a lot".. hahahahahaha I felt like such a weirdo.

Since we changed the status it's been such an eye opener for me and really sweet. I guess I'm a cynical cow because obviously the rest of the world thinks new relationships are way more special than I do. Well, let me explain that.... I'm very happy with this new relationship...it's pretty damn awesome but I just hadn't anticipated that anybody else would give a damn.

The comments on his status especially have been pretty overwhelming. I feel like I just announced that I'm engaged or pregnant or something. He has so many responses and all of them so sweet. 

One of the comments talks about how important validation from people who care about us and whom we care about is. The person who left the comment was basically trying to say that no man is an island and ... you know... people need people! I completely agree with his sentiments and it did make me feel slightly less of a Muppet for announcing my life in that way. Yes it might be a little bit naff but to see all of that love from so many people really does make the whole thing a little bit more special. Their happiness for us just adds an extra bit of sparkle :)

terrible photo I love #2

I am feeling very lucky. I have a very special man who is proud to tell everybody he knows that I'm important to him! How cool is that!!!! 

So, yeah, YAY ME :-)

Hashtag Fail

I have failed. This year the A -Z in April has just not worked out very well at all. I had good intentions but nothing has worked out very well. So much has happened this month, so many things I would like to write about that have taken my time and mental realestate. I havent kept up because the things I want to write about just dont fit the challenge.

So...there ya go. Good luck to you all who have done better than I have and I will hopefully get a few minutes to visit you sometime soon.

Xo

G is for 'GO'

It's kinda strange but I find this Visa ad quite inspiring. How simple just 'GO'. Do it, Jump, Play, Yes, Dance, Explore, Kiss GO

I'm thinking that it would actually make a great tattoo if I could ever decide on font and placement LOL

GO

xo

F is for 'Falling for you' (Mr pt 2)

***I'm gonna go ahead and post two in one day today since I don't think I'm going to have the energy tomorrow. There is stuff!! This is also a Sunday when no posting is supposed to be happening but I will stop till Tuesday and then all will be right with the world ***

I decided for this post to be super honest and  take it personal... waaaay personal. Why not right?? Today a letter to Mr... (who we first met here)

Dear Mr

You're kind of amazing. You are also kind of annoying and I sometimes want to punch you in the face but ever since we've had the chance to hang out properly I have found myself, much to my dismay, really and seriously falling for you. 

I haven't told you this and right now I'm really focusing on not letting it fall out of my mouth. I really have no idea how to say it or really exactly what I even want to say so let the random stream of consciousness begin ! 

When we're together it's the most natural thing in the world. I am so damn comfortable with you and I love the way you look after me. As I always tell you, you're so smart and you have such cool stories, I am endlessly entertained and fascinated by you. You are so good at doing little things that I always notice and which always make me smile. I don't know if you know you're even doing them or the value I really place on them though. I guess I should probably tell you things like that shouldn't I?  :)

I like that we're so different and yet we get on so well. It's cool for our worlds to collide and I hope they begin to collide more and more.  I am falling hard for you but we're not there yet. I want the chance to be able to make you as happy as you make me and I don't know how to do it yet. There's a lot more to learn. 

I'm falling for you fast. Someone like you is a totally new experience for me and I like it. I don't want to tell you this yet because it feels like we have a lot of adapting to each other and each others lives to do before my cynical and overly analytic brain can accept it as real. I am beginning to learn that sometimes it's good to lead with your heart instead of your head but it's not easy to change the habits of a life time.

I promise to be as patient as I can with you if you do the same for me. I want to be careful not to change you and I don't plan to change who I am either but when we get to the point that we can evolve in little ways together and find real, mutually satisfying compromises then that will be the time that I can and will confidently tell you that I love you. Until then it will be a secret that I just share with the internet ok? :-P

xo

A-Z in April. A is for Auntie

I decided to do the A-Z in April blog challenge again this year. I've participated twice before and it's how I came across some of my all time fave blogs and also it's just a great challenge to make you think about interesting and different posts. I was planning to have a snazzy theme and work out some cool posts before hand but that didn't happen so I'm going to have to wing it. I'll probably just think of something appropriate for each day as I sit down to write and go for it :)

These are pics from last weekend. I stayed with my sister and my nephew. What a great weekend! This is my first time being Auntie and as he gets older it's getting more and more fun. I have to admit that babies do nothing for me, even when they're super cute and well behaved. He's 15 months now and so just beginning to be pretty awesome :)

In these pics we're hanging out in the gardens and he stole my drink and goobered in it. For some reason that I cant put my finger on it was sooooo hilarious and of course my sister managed to capture my hysterics!

This was also the first time that he's really noticed me and was being so friendly. It was absolutely lovely and I just cant wait to hang out with him as he grows and learns. I may be a lil bit biased but by my reckoning he's the most handsome and the smartest little guy in the world...EVER :-P

xo

life is hard for control freaks sometimes

It's a little hard to put what I want to write about into words for this post. In the last week..as late as this afternoon I've had experiences that have made me so happy and heard news that made me so sad. I wont go into it as both things are very personal but they've both made me realise how little control we have over the outcome of our lives. There are just so many unknowables and there is just no answer to that pit of confusion and worry in your stomach. Things just have to happen as they happen.

It's really hard to be ok with things happening on their own schedule. In both of my scenarios I just want to jump to the end so I can KNOW!!!! ARGH it's so frustrating. When you're dealing with other humans there is no such thing as control. You just have to find a distraction and find a way to deal. 

I wonder how to stop thinking about it and how to make the wait less excruciating? Grrr

:/

The words count people!

Today one of my lovely patients told me that after 63 years of marriage  his wife had told him she loved him for the first time that morning!!! WOW. Now I don't know exactly how true that might be but it was either the best or worst thing today I just cant decide. 

I find that so peculiar. You could argue that she showed him every day for 63 years that she loved him by being his wife and all that the title entails but I think the words count. The look on that gentleman's face as he told his story prove that words matter. I have a personal philosophy of always saying what I think about someone... well the good stuff at least. I know it's pretty rare and people sometimes get a little weird about it but if I think something nice about you I'm going to tell you! 

Generally we need to get better at taking compliments. It's nothing for us to believe bad things that we hear about ourselves but when it comes to compliments and nice things we get uncomfortable and disregard the words. We think the person telling us something nice is just trying to be nice or to make us feel good or something. Well... DUH! Yes, of course but that doesn't mean they're lying or making things up. 

For Mr's birthday last week I decided to do a birthday week. I sent him 7 small gifts and 7 nice notes over 7 days. On each of those notes I wrote something about him that I like. Something great about his personality ( and person LOL) that makes me happy and which I want him to know. I put it right out there and gave very specific examples of the sorts of things he is and things he does that make him awesome. He's decided to wait and open all 7 packages when I see him next and I'm a bit worried that it's going to be a pretty intense couple of minutes. I almost decided not to go and to make him open them alone but then I realised that each of those 7 things is something true. Even when he's being annoying or when the small things seem big he IS all of those big and important things. I want him to know what I think about him, especially on his birthday so I guess if it's face to face then so be it :) 

I don't tend to go around giving people those sorts of compliments to people because that WOULD be weird but I'm never backwards in coming forwards and I've found that the more I do it the easier it becomes. I tell everybody nice things and you know what? they like it! If you just think something it's meaningless and nobody benefits soooooo spill it. Say what's on your mind but just don't make a big deal about it coz that CAN be a little creepy hahahahahaha

xo

  

A few of my faves from the weekend :)

I stole Mr's shirt! It's so soft and cozy and it's great to sleep in AND wear with jean shorts to hang out. Score :)

We moved the cut down thingy (LOL) and had ourselves a lil fire. Then we started playing with the lasers. So fun.. and pretty as well. 

My view on a great morning from the current place I'm working. It really makes it easy to get up early to start at 7.30am. I love how beautiful my city looks from here.

This blury pic is of a cruise ship leaving Auckland. I was hanging out at the beach with my friend and just loving how beautiful the night was and how nice to be out and about making the most of the end of summer :)

Television sucks your soul...

TVNZ is so clever. They've put season 4 of Pretty Little Liars on at 12pm on a Sunday. I had no idea why and really thought it was dumb because this show should be rating through the roof. Teenage girls ( and 35 year old women) LOVE this shizz! Seriously it's freaking awesome. The old slot of 5.30 on a Sunday was bad enough... 

Then today while I was watching I started to have a few epiphanies. I never watch TV during the day..EVER so score right there for the television station as they have instantly got an extra hour of ad watching out of me. I would have probably watched something in the old time slot so this really is a bonus hour for them. I cant believe how much of your day ends up being sucked up when you turn the box on! 

The other thing I realised was that I watch this show and while I really like it I do tend to come away feeling slightly under-dressed under-groomed and ... old. I always want to run out and buy something to remedy that after watching the hot young high schoolers race around after the Ubiquitous 'A'. That's not their fault. It makes sense to have good looking people play these roles and the show is really not about that. It isn't at all focused on their looks and they are really all pretty kick ass characters. It's just years of media conditioning. 

I love this show and make an effort to see it and yet I feel sorta conflicted about that. I honestly think it's a good example of how Television is way WAY too important. I need to get a life!

I think that when I'm more in a position to make it happen I'm going to make a big goal of watching less T.V. just to see how much more fun my life becomes. I'm picking that if I'm conscious about it and make an effort to fill my time with fun things and cool people I'm going to come away feeling much more entertained and also feeling a ton more awesome about who I am and what I represent.

xo